Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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