Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Randomize