how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You need a sexual gate keeper
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
