How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
