the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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