bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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