some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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