On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
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