the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
How external is "for external use only"?
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize