I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
