Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
