where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize