i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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