so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
