Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
