Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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