he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
