she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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