lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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