I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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