he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
