somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
