This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
