Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
