dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
