1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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