just come out here and I will go home with you...
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
