The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
