ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
