After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
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