She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You pole danced in your parka.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
