Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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