Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
