Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Randomize
