is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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