Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
