we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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