so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
