He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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