Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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