she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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