There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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