Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
So squirting runs in the family.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
