doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
