Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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