I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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