I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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