Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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