I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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