U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I think a kid would responsible me up
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
The feeling are messing with the penis
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize